Hi lovely lovely ladies,
Warning: truthful heartfelt content included.
Eek I’ve been thinking about this for a while in fact it’s something I’ve been going through for sometime and today at church the words love, selfish, love more and love them anyway were ringing around like a massive church bell in my head! Oh alright then God if I must…..
I like to keep it real, I like to share my mind, my thoughts my heart and my own journey.
I love people, always have, I am a relational person who loves to connect with just about anyone and everyone. Now as I’ve got older I’ve realised that people don’t always love you back and that’s ok and that it’s actually ok not to like some people too but I’ve always been taught to love them anyway.
But sometimes caring for and loving others doesn’t feel good.
Sometimes, it’s easier not to love.
Over the past year, and unbeknown to me, I have become an expert at self-preservation and pain avoidance.
Anything that hurt, I’m saying it’s a year because that’s when I can really feel the changes in how I love people but it could be longer, so anything that hurt I didn’t touch — including the people I loved the most.
Someone said to me when I said I’m just guarding my heart ‘make sure guarding doesn’t become the building of a wall’ in all honesty I can say that over the past year or so the wall had already been started it’s not until a real shake up recently that I’ve really held Gods hand and ventured into my inner most thoughts to find out what’s going on.
“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another” John 13:34
Love is about being obedient to Him, love really does conquer all. Love wins. Every time.
So when we are hurt both knowingly and unknowingly we start to protect ourselves through avoidance, through taking a step back and building that concrete block wall that takes a lot longer to chip down than it does to build.
Here is a piece from Charlotte Gambill….
‘Guard your heart but don’t hide it. Protect it but don’t withhold it. Be careful with it but don’t confine it. It’s not easy to walk this balance. We give our heart to things, people, projects and sometimes our heart is broken, misunderstood or mishandled. But that’s where we have to learn to guard so that God can guide. Guard is not reactive its proactive. Guarding is not defensive it’s protective . Guarding is not to keep people out, but to cover what’s within. Today love well and guard well’
Who are we as Christians if we walk around unlovingly avoiding those around us? Those that we love. That’s not what Jesus did, it’s not what Jesus instructs us to do either. We need to LOVE well and guard well.
Hurt gives the enemy a free pass into our soul, it opens doors that normally wouldn’t even be there. It gives him opportunity to lie to us at our most vulnerable. He assists us in building the wall that we misinterpret for guarding, in that wall are bricks of resentment, bitterness, hurt, unforgiveness and so much more. But here is the most amazing thing. If we LOVE anyway, it conquers all. That one word takes down all those bricks all at once. LOVE! We were made to LOVE everyone. We don’t have to like everyone but we are here to LOVE.
What I have learnt is this: There are times when the love I have for others is not a matter of feeling, but rather a matter of my decision to be obedient to Him.
The question is, when real love results in me feeling uncomfortable or even a heart-wrenching level of pain, am I willing to love well anyway?
And again here are the wise words of Charlotte Gambill, words that have resonated into my heart, words that along with Gods grace and trust have guided me out of my wall building and back into loving.
‘Love can never lose. Though it can appear the weaker choice to others it often takes the greatest strength. Though it doesn’t show its price tag it’s often the most expensive, but God always adds interest to those who invest in it. Love has greater power than the pain and will heal your hurts. Love will always serve you better than other emotions that offer themselves to you when your feeling vulnerable. Love is not easy but it’s Gods way. In your frustration, betrayal, loss what ever you may face, I pray you are brave enough to choose love even when others don’t. Choose love though its hard, do it because all the other options will only steal your sleep and rob your peace’.
So girls I want to leave you with this prayer tonight….
Father God, I thank You for Your love for your love that never fails and never gives up on me. You are the perfect example of great love, love that you offer constantly even when I don’t return it. Help me to love like You. I want to honor You by doing my best to love others in the way You have loved me, even when it hurts.
In Jesus Name, Amen.
With mucho love always